Camping Ain't What It Used To Be!

Last weekend was our annual Young Adult Campout. Normally I love camping. After all, my in-laws own a lot where, while we're camping & sort of roughing it, there are showers & an indoor heated pool. However, Don's idea of roughing it is when the room service at a 3+ star hotel is late. He's convinced he's too old to go camping anymore. While he stayed in camp I braved a trip down the river with Gracelyn, Tobiah, Shawna, & Shawna's boyfriend, Chris. Chris had two boats, both of which we all took turns tipping. It was a blast, really! I even wore waterproof sunscreen. Being an extremely fair person who burns easily I figured that was the safe thing to do. However, the sunscreen didn't work all that well & apparently even with waterproof sunscreen it's important to reapply every few hours if you spend loads of time in the water. By the time we got back & had supper, my legs looked like pepto-bismol. My arms were burnt too, but not as badly.

I must be getting old, becacuse though it was still in the mid 70s, I was freezing! I couldn't get warm, even after a hot shower. Don actually thinks I may have gone into shock because I was shaking so badly that my words were coming out like this: "Ccccaaaan yyyoouuuu haaanddd mmmee thhhuuuuh hhooottt ch ch ch ch chooocc cca lllate?" When I went to bed, he smothered me in blankets. That was after I took 4 Advil & a Vicodin. Between that & my allergy medicine, I was out for the count. That is, until around 2:30 in the morning when Don had to fight 5 crazy raccoons that were ransacking the campsight. He's pretty sure that after he threw numerous objects at them, such as a marshmallow roasting stick, they went back to their little camp laughing about the crazy human with the terrible aim. He's convinced they were mocking him.

By morning I'd started talking normally & we all got ready to head home. As we lay in our own bed that night, Don looked at me and said, "I never want to go camping again." I lay there in shorts & a tank top, aloe vera slathered up and down my half white & half pink legs. I said, "Whatever, Honey. Just don't touch me."

It's definitely a trip I will remember forever. There's a reason God had me born in the century where I get to enjoy indoor plumbing and electricity. I used to be all about the adventure. I grew up camping. When I plan my next outing I think it'll include a hotel on the water where I can sip sparkling apple cider as the sun sets over the Pacific. For old time sake maybe I'll even smooth on a little waterproof sunscreen and stutter.